I have come to the conclusion that I have body issues not gender issues and on that diagnosis I have come terms with my past actions.
Whimsy with a twist
girl gets her groove on
I have come to the conclusion that I have body issues not gender issues and on that diagnosis I have come terms with my past actions.
(I know...right...DUCK!) Is there a list of proper terminology that I could copy and post round the office? I don't feel a huge need to reinvent the wheel...& I do, not so fondly remember when so many of the terms we use were an absolute mystery to me. I think that more exposure to proper terminology could do nothing to hurt, and might go miles in avoiding conflict by mishap.
So…
Anyone know of a good list?
of course, the newspapers in the town where she died refuse to use the appropriate gender, and furthermore they are immediately making typical racist assumptions about the nature of her religion. She had traveled to New Jersey from Arkansas to participate in a Voodoo cleansing ritual, after the ritual everyone went to sleep, and Lucie never woke up. The ritual had nothing to do with her death, but the headlines are reading "VOODOO CEREMONY GONE BAD!" the paper is making it clear exactly what we, the white christian public, should think about african traditional religion.
moreover the first two comments on her obituary are mocking.
if you feel so moved to let the Gloucester County Times know what you think of their coverage of this tragedy, I encourage you to comment or contact the paper.
here is the story.
( and here is Lucie )
SORRY BOUT THE SPELL CHECK.
I'M SLEEPY.
( holy shit I been on an emo roller coaster all month. I m either ranting about suicide as an art project or quitting queerness, punk, and making decisions about my own life or somthing about that ugly. Its embarassing and vulnerable and repetative and kinna crazy. WELL I VE DECIDED TO GO TO CANADA AND START ALL OVER AND TRY TO GET A LIFE BEFORE X-MAS )
Greetings
How does one go about learning the practicalities of living stealth? And what about other details of long-term post-transition living? I’d really love guidance/advice on stealth, and am having great difficulty finding people with experience who can answer my questions.
This makes sense, as of course stealth folks wouldn’t want to be found. But surely there must be someway to find someone to talk with. Any advice? Are there other forums to check out? People to contact? Is there anyone here who'd be willing and able to answer some questions about their experience?
I am in my mid 20s, blend very well, and basically my idea is to change my name (again) and move to a
- 18:47:00: getting ready to go out to a restaurant for dinner! We eat out all the time, but most places around here are takeaway only. #fb
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I'm beginning to research surgeons so I can get my ducks in a row and know what to expect. I'm lucky enough to have insurance that will cover insurance, but the stipulations and conditions and hoops I'll have to go through to find a surgeon already seems daunting. I also was born in Illinois; So, for insurance purposes and Illinois' stupid birth certificate laws (for now) I need to find an SRS surgeon in the United States for $20,000 or less. So far, I've found the major names of course.. Bowers, Meltzer, and Brassard (not sure if Insurance would work with Brassard), Reed (which from everything I've read is a big no-no), and Christine McGinn.
Here's where the problem comes in, and I have to imagine I'm not the only one with this problem:
I'm overweight. Now, to be fair, I don't -look- all that overweight, and I mainly carry my weight in my belly. My arms and legs are actually very toned. I'm about 5'8", and at last doctor's appointment weighed about 298. (Still don't look it though).
Just about every surgeon's information I've found have weight restrictions; Bowers site I believe states patients should be 210lbs or less, McGinn's states patients should have a BMI of 28 or less (which for 5'8" is about 170lbs. Get Real.)
I know that I can't be the only overweight MTF person in the world, and I know that there have to have been others who have successfully had SRS. I can't imagine surgeons would turn away clients based on weight issues alone.
So then, does anyone out there have any experiences with surgeons / surgery and weight issues? I'm willing to try to lose weight, but I don't think that trying to lose 100+ lbs in the next 1-2 years is all that practical, feasible, or realistic.
x-posted to
No idea where to start aka A Ton of Newbie Questions
Posted byMy problem is, with a family doctor out of the question, I have no idea what to do. I really want to get started, at least on HRT before next year..if that's even possible. Except I don't know how much that would cost me. I'm basically only making minimum wage, so while I don't pay rent, or too many bills, I don't exactly have a lot of money to throw around. I know Ohip covers some parts of this now, so what parts would I be paying for/how much would I expect to pay? I really just want HRT, and top surgery, and the female organs and stuff removed..I could care less about the penis (one good thing about being asexual and trans..I get to save a few thousand dollars!), so would any doctors be willing to do this? Would I even be able to legally change my gender marker on birth certificates and passports if I don't get the full surgery?
There's a free clinic in my neighborhood, and I've been debating whether or not I should just walk in there and tell one of the doctors there. Or should I go to some other place? I know Toronto has a few transgender friendly clinics, I just don't know where they are.
Personally, I really like the idea of going to Thailand for this surgery, because it's cheaper, and I get to avoid the people I already know watching me go through a slow transition which just sounds embarrassing. Except I don't know anything about that either. I mean, do I talk to a doctor or a travel agent? Neither seems right! D:
And one last really stupid question, which I only ask because I might have an opportunity to go to Trinidad next year, and if I go there, I want to swim. Which I won't be doing if I have to wear that..girl..bathing suit. So...how soon, if I started this summer, would I be able to get top surgery done? I probably already know the answer to this..but it can't hurt to ask.
Her post is here.
Thanks!
I'm getting a new computer and FL Studio and money to press CDs!
I'm going to make a fucking album!
My life is fucking strange. Fun, but strange. What the fuck world?
***
Isn't it odd
Considering how striking transwomen are, how the mere sight of us inspires a bizarre array of emotions and behaviors, how we wear our fierce refusal to live easy lives writ large upon our breasts like martyrs before a kindled stake, how we dive face-first into a life of utter madness and inexhaustable hilarity, how we pick the locks to the venusian libraries after hours and study the forbidden grimoires therein, how we pierce and cut and mutilate our flesh and willfully break our bones, how we redraft and rebuild our bodies from tortured meats and grist shat out by the cosmos, animated by a hateful god, how we shapeshift and perform dazzling feats of thought control upon dumbstruck citizenry, how we don cunning disguises like espionage agents operating in the field, how we grow our hair long like the trelisses of a crumbling tower, how our eyes shine out of our skulls like deep black rivers, how we thrust ourselves shorn and naked before hoards of dogs who can fulfill only our stomachs, how we meet in underground passageways and alleys to circulate the strategies of our people, how we travel from town to town in search of rest before the inevitable hostility of tradition threatens to swallow us and forces us back into the underbrush, how we sever our family lines violently and unceremoniously for nothing more than the appeasement of phantasmic demons, how we speak in strange codes in strange voices of survival's grueling demands, how we revel in music and theatre and light and costume and frivolity and humor yet are so seldom participants, how we close our eyes when we laugh and the corners pool with tears, how we obscure those eyes behind dark glass like a funeral mother, how we embrace deeply and longingly with strong yet vulnerable arms, how time carves lines into our faces that reveal the deep concentration and agonizing stamina with which we must conduct our day-to-day business, how we force ourselves from blissful, dreamy slumber, out of beds and into a world that casts stones at us, how we stand for the union of opposites, how we are living metaphors for the balance of all extremity that is so longed for by humanity, how our bodies are like motherfucking double fudge rocky-road pistachio cherry mint banana spilts in a world of chocolate and vanilla, isn't it odd that so many of us have such a hard time getting proper fucked? It's simple, really. Beyond our bodies, beyond our clothes, beyond the politics, beyond the messageboards, beyond the surgery clinics, beyond Thailand, beyond the DSM, beyond therapy, beyond genderfucking, beyond passing, beyond our community, and beyond the dismal beauty pageant that we so often feel that we must endure, the truth is that each one of us is merely a human being with a soul that has been kicked around who is in need of deep, authentic, personal love. Give her love. That is how you fuck a transwoman.
Tit worship doesn't hurt either.
<3 crissy snail, 2009
***
gaudy? overwrought? yep..
that's just how i do it.
~crissy
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I went to the doctor on Friday as a walk-in patient and I explained my situation and gave him my letter from my psychologist. His original plan of action was to put me on a testosterone blocker for a couple of months and then introduce estrogen, however I told him I'm moving to Vancouver at the end of the month when he told me that the T-blocker would require numerous blood tests. He decided that because I'm going to be leaving it'd be pointless to do blood work now and then have to do it all over again when I get there as they won't have been there from the beginning and be as knowledgeable about my history, so he put me on .625 milligrams of estrogen for the first two weeks at one tablet a day, and then after the two weeks I begin taking two tablets, and after a couple of months I'm to find a doctor in Vancouver and start doing the t-blocker.
So my questions are these: Has anyone else done this, and will the testosterone in my system severely limit the effects of the estrogen while I'm on them pre-blocker, or will the estrogen basically just do its thing around the testosterone?
reservations, to the point where I think I'll try it when it
launches. It's like.. pretty asian warcraft. If anything, it
might make a nice stopgap while waiting for Final Fantasy 14.
It seems like if WoW and Lineage had a baby, and that baby was
raised by capcom's 'monster hunter' franchise, this would be
that baby.
What about you guys? try it? or pass?
My prescription for Lu's: Take two doses of tolerance and call me in the morning.
Xposted
Vancouver, BC: Feminijas 1, Transphobic Pharmacy 0
Posted byMy prescription for Lu's: Take two doses of tolerance and call me in the morning.
Xposted
My prescription for Lu's: Take two doses of tolerance and call me in the morning.
Xposted
the one above my right temple
it's killing me
i'm sorry for whatever i did
but take the pin out it hurts
- 09:18:30: is in another meeting #fb
- 13:26:18: having trouble keeping my eyes open and awaiting a cup of coffee. #fb
- 17:40:09: done workin' for the day - question remains, will our intrepid hero get the weekend off or not? #fb
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Fresh to Def- Female Version of a Hustler
Posted byFemale version of a hustla cuz she be makin money we be makin moves we be stuntin while u frontin...
Wednesday July 15th
11pm
Gladstone Hotel
1214 Queen Str. West
Dj zehra makin u move with hip hop soca reggae r&b bollywood bhangra
Posters for sale by Kambili and Teresa
MINI BALL :::::::::::::Number 1 Hustler Competition::::::::::::::Hosted by Kalmplex
Fresh to def is a weekly party by and for 2-Spirit, Trans//Queer Indigenous, Black and Peeps of Colour. Everyones welcome.
Wednesday Nights at 11pm
Gladstone Hotel
1214 Queen W.
JULY PARTIES
July 15th: Female Version of a Hustler w/DJ Zehra
July 22nd: Queer Against Israeli Apartheid After Party w/ DJ May El Abdallah
July 29th: QUEERIBANA
freshtodefwednesday@gmail.com
http://www.facebook.com/event.php?eid=9
http://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=9
Rock Climbing video
Posted bywho's this?: aneurysm - Shadowgate Shuffle OC ReMix | Powered by Last.fm
Chaz Bono’s first public appearance with Girlfriend
Posted bywho's this?: Absolute Classic Rock
http://nydailynews.com/gossip/2009/07/1
Chaz Bono shows off girlfriend Jennifer Elia at Outfest
BY Joanna Sloame
DAILIY NEWS WRITER
Friday, July 10th 2009, 11:59 AM

Chaz Bono (R) and his girlfriend Jennifer Elia (L) live together in West Hollywood. (Vazquez/Getty)
Who knew Chaz had a hottie girlfriend?
Chaz Bono, who usually keeps his personal life private, showed off gorgeous galpal Jennifer Elia Thursday night at Outfest in Los Angeles.
Outfest is the largest film festival for gay/lesbian/transgender-themed flicks in the country.
The son of Cher and the late Sonny Bono recently revealed he is undergoing a sex change to become a man, and has changed his name from Chastity to Chaz in the process.
A political and social activist, Chaz lives in West Hollywood with the brunette beauty. Bono began the sex change process in early March shortly after his 40th birthday.
"I am excited for Chaz that he will now be able to live life the way he wants to and in a body that is more comfortable for him," Kristen Schaffer, the executive director of Outfest told RadarOnline.com in June. "Chaz's 'coming out' as transgender is wonderful for the LGBT community as it not only increases transgender visibility, but also shows that we should never compromise our own identity."
To disclose or not to disclose
Posted bywho's this?: Absolute Radio
To disclose or not to disclose
by Joe Ippolito
July 9, 3:21 PM
Disclosing to a potential dating partner can be an anxiety producing experience for many "passing" transgender people. Passing is the ability to present oneself as a gender other than one assigned at birth and to live in an unrecognizable state in society as this new gender.
For some, the notion of being rejected because of their transgender identity is so terrifying they opt to remain "in the closet," and end up not dating at all. For others, telling a potential dating partner may not be something they ever do. However, if disclosing is something you personally feel is important to you then it might be helpful to keep these few points in mind when deciding to open up in this way. For starters, you may want to feel the person out first to see exactly where they stand on similar political and social issues, such as gay and lesbian concerns, and/or determine how they relate to certain gender roles? Is this person more politically conservative then you expected? Do they think lesbians are really women who have merely not "landed" a good man? Do they think it is wrong for men to wear pink and women to wear blue? Depending on what the answer to these questions are, you may want or need to reconsider who this person is and if they really make a good dating partner for you. However, if you decide to go forward with the dating relationship you will then need to figure out a good time to talk with them about your gender identity.
( Read more... )
To disclose or not to disclose
Posted bywho's this?: Absolute Radio
To disclose or not to disclose
by Joe Ippolito
July 9, 3:21 PM
Disclosing to a potential dating partner can be an anxiety producing experience for many "passing" transgender people. Passing is the ability to present oneself as a gender other than one assigned at birth and to live in an unrecognizable state in society as this new gender.
For some, the notion of being rejected because of their transgender identity is so terrifying they opt to remain "in the closet," and end up not dating at all. For others, telling a potential dating partner may not be something they ever do. However, if disclosing is something you personally feel is important to you then it might be helpful to keep these few points in mind when deciding to open up in this way. For starters, you may want to feel the person out first to see exactly where they stand on similar political and social issues, such as gay and lesbian concerns, and/or determine how they relate to certain gender roles? Is this person more politically conservative then you expected? Do they think lesbians are really women who have merely not "landed" a good man? Do they think it is wrong for men to wear pink and women to wear blue? Depending on what the answer to these questions are, you may want or need to reconsider who this person is and if they really make a good dating partner for you. However, if you decide to go forward with the dating relationship you will then need to figure out a good time to talk with them about your gender identity.
( Read more... )
So there's this macro I found where you can actually push WoW's graphic
quality past the maximum ammount listed in graphics settings. Depending
on the area you're in, it can make you lag like hell, but it 'beautifies"
the environment around you, deepends shadows, makes texture cleaner and
crisper, etc. Here are some shots of me playing with it out in Arathi.
it's not really good for anything beyond taking really cool screenshots.
I play at maximum settings already, and in certain locales, it takes me
from 50 fps all the way to like 5 fps. Still, a fun gimmick, nonetheless.

( The macro is below the cut, as well. )

[- imadeyouabeard -]
Surprise appearances by members of Angela Chase! A short performance by Madison that got added at the last moment isn't on the flyer! Queers! OOOoooo
EMS stress aside... I am struggling at the moment with producing black curry, and damn it all I plan on getting it done. From what I have been able to tell, my natural sense for curries (ehhem) told me that roasting is somehow involved in black curries and, it seems, that I was correct. I had planned on roasting peppers and grinding up the black skins, incorporating the black powder into a standard curry recipe. It works well when I make my kalo pinjur sauce, and adds a lot more heat than people would expect. But it looks like traditional black curry (which I guess is a Sri Lankan thing and a Sindhi thing) is just roasted yellow curry powder, pretty much. I think that I might incorporate both methods into one recipe, though I am going to need to invest in a coffee grinder if I am going to be grinding skins and cloves and all these other things.
S'gonna be good though. I am thinking chicken.
( Black Curry Powder Recipe I done come up with... (Ignore the Kalderas name...Leave me what broken piecemeal culture I have...Ha) )
The pomegranite seed miiiight make the recipe a bit too acidic, but I figure that the coconut milk will balance that out. Once I have the money to blow on raw ingredients, and can remember where the local Indian market is around here for the dried pomegranite seed, I will give it a shot.
- 06:33:11: is awake, somewhat unwillingly. I need a day off.
- 11:05:41: is 10 000% less frustrated after getting permission to work from home for the day. #fb
- 19:30:42: is still workin' from home, but doing it while eating slice cake and pine tart and drinkin' de banks beer. In the dark, at 7:30. #fb
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Arc of Appalachia has done... appropriately with natural sites in the past, but their approach seems miscalibrated here. They plan to keep the Mound in better shape with a smaller budget and fewer staff by restricting access. With their other projects, such as the Hozho Canyon/Highland Sanctuary site, free access passes are available but must be reserved five days in advance and are limited in number. They weren't explicit on how they will determine who has access to Serpent Mound (native people are guaranteed no-questions-asked freedom under AIRF and other laws) but their attitude in the hearing was adequately summed up by an adjacent landowner- "you think we're a bunch of rednecks who don't deserve to go on sacred places."
Of course exclusion preserves natural spaces, but is wholly inappropriate for cultural sites, like Serpent Mound, and the various Native people in the audience were more than happy to explain exactly how thrilled with the arrangement they weren't. And while we're talking about native people, what about that Hozho Canyon? Hozho is a Diné word, the site was historically Shawnee, the flyer shows a woman playing a Lakota flute, and the interpretive resources are laid out according to the I Ching. At least the Shawnee and the Lakota have some linguistic ties, I guess. AoA attempted to placate the Indians with promises to "consult and respect" local Shawnee elders, but it was clear the elders understood that those words are the opposite of power. White American culture believes very strongly- too strongly for anyone else's taste- in the importance of good intentions.
So, as my road-trip friend put it, the torch of historic preservation and management is being passed to the hippie generation, and they're having exactly the same problems the previous generation, who were, lets remember, fond of digging dead people up and mounting them on display for visitors, is only now making good. And it all starts over again.
But that wasn't the important part of the meeting, not for me. What I found so interesting was that the local contingent were a bunch of rednecks- and they had an unbelievable respect for the mound. No- they had a need for it. It was important to them. They told stories of childhood picnics, sneaking in to watch the sunrise, solstice celebrations, a deep sense of meaning they derived from visiting an enormous earthwork of uncertain origin and use. I am pretty convinced this was more than a hometown pride kind of thing- these folks just happened to be the ones who made it to the hearing. Had it been a national conversation, I'm sure similar people with similar stories would report in from all across the country.
So, for all the pompous and aggressive christianization of the last administration, lets take a moment to recognize something. Americans remain a religiously polyglot nation, where not only are invokations of "the sacred" acceptable in a public policy context from an established religious perspective, but innominate, almost animist sacristy is also felt, spoken, and considered without blushing. Is this the Obama era? Is this just how it is? Are we all hippies now?
At any rate, I now know the gayest place to get nun puppets in all of Chillicothe.
--JULIE BLAIR
Thanks :)
Bike problems and getting back into biking.
Posted bySo, now the questions.
1) Is it hard to pedal my bike simply due to me being out of shape,or could it be something mechanical?
2) Is my bike simply too small for me?
3) Should I move to a higher psi tire? (I'm actually thinking about moving back to my knobbies as they seemed to have less resistance, and I'd like to be able to take it off road. I know they have more, but maybe it's a mental thing?)
4) Is it worth it to replace the handle bar and stem?
5) What could be the problem with my drivetrain? New cassettes? Derailleur? Chain? Is it fixable?
6) The front shock is old and has very little travel, should I replace?
7) Would it be better just to get a better fitting new/used bike?
That's all I can think of at the moment... I hope it isn't too overwhelming. I'd just really like to get back on the bike and do my old 30-40 mile day trips that I did in highschool.
1) Has any one else here ever been in a relationship with some one whose sexual identity doesn't exactly match your gender so much as your sex? If so, should I be worried? I feel worried... I like... her
2) What are some effects of T that I really really need to remember to say when we have our conversation? Are there any that you've accidently scared any on with? I don't want to... surprise her too much.
Help appreciated... >.>
-James
I've looked around the past couple of days on here, and I decided to make an introduction.
Name's Dominick, how 'ya do? I'm just under 20, and I am a FTM. I used to live in Oklahoma, but due to home situation I moved to Bangor, Maine (on my own at the start. I managed to find several great people to share rent in an apartment).
I'm still frustrated at my current state in transition, which has stalled due to financial reasons. I am in therapy, have been diagnosed with GID, and now I am stuck. Money, money, money, everyone wants money that I do not have to give.
Aside from that, I am a bit of a bibliophile, I like bowling, billiards, art, Galaga, and Sherlockiana.
I hope to talk to some of you guys, gals, in-betweens and off-the-charts soon!
US; PA: Allegheny County OKs nondiscrimination bill
Posted byPhiladelphia Gay News
July 9, 2009
by Jen Colletta
The Allegheny County Council approved a bill last week that would prohibit discrimination against LGBT county residents in employment, housing and public accommodations.
The council approved the Allegheny County Human Relations Ordinance in an 8-6 vote July 1, and county executive Dan Onorato indicated later that night that he will sign the legislation.
The bill, proposed by Councilwoman Amanda Green last summer, additionally creates a seven-member human-relations commission to investigate and adjudicate cases of potential discrimination.
( Read more... )
I posted about this on a trans discussion mailing list I belong to, and the replies added up to "So what? They're women, they should have a pharmacy. Why are you complaining? Why is this our problem?"
Internalised transphobia FTL.
US; PA: SEPTA panel recommends end to genderized fares
Posted byPhiladelphia Gay News
July 9, 2009
by Timothy Cwiek
The 27-member SEPTA Citizen Advisory Committee has unanimously recommended that the transit agency stop using gender markers in its fare-collection system.
Since the 1970s, SEPTA has placed gender stickers on its weekly and monthly passes to reduce swapping between males and females. SEPTA also issues gender-specific reduced-fare cards for seniors and the disabled.
But LGBT advocates have protested this practice, noting that its implementation requires gender stereotyping on the part of SEPTA personnel, which they contend is against federal law.
Now advocates have the support of SEPTA’s advisory committee, due to the committee’s unanimous vote at its June 30 public meeting.
“SEPTA is unintentionally discriminating on the basis of sex because it’s only singling out the category of gender for fraud reduction,” said committee chair Robert Clearfield. “We believe SEPTA may be violating federal law. And it’s our hope they’ll stop doing so, immediately.”
( Read more... )
US; PA: Man in women's clothing found dead in park
Posted byAlso note that the article from the Daily News dated July 3.
Man in women's clothing found dead in park
Philadelphia Gay News
Wednesday, July 9, 2009
A jogger in Fairmount Park last week found a man dressed in female clothing whom police say was murdered.
( Read more... )
Butch transwomen, out of the woodwork with you
Posted byca va?:
You may call me Kat - I am 23 years old and have been transitioning from male to female for the past four years or so. I've been on hormones for a bit over two. I have not had surgery done, nor do I, in the foreseeable future, intend to have it done.
All throughout my transition I have had doubts, and recent events have only magnified them. I need to get this stuff off my chest or I will not be able to have any sort of peace.
So with the introduction basically out of the way, allow me to get to the heart of the matter.... ( Read more... )

jubilant
accomplished